History is full of heart-ache. I walked to Lauzerte, famous as being one of the “plus belles villes de France,” where people have been living at least since 1000 BCE. This afternoon I walked around this exceptionally lovely city, high on a hill, with sweeping views down verdant valleys all around, stately medieval houses everywhere you look, charming boutiques to entice you in the door, and an air of self-confidence that comes from countless centuries of success and failure, failure and success. The city has been overwhelmed and conquered at least five major times, depending on how you count it. For many centuries it was a vassal territory of Toulouse. Today we walk around these structures with a notion that it has always been as it is now, calm and orderly, quaint and pretty. But the reality of life in Lauzerte was undoubtedly grim for most of its history. Devastated by the plague four times (each time almost completely wiping out the city), occupation for nearly a century by the English (who did not treat them well), numerous defeats in battle – the city still endured and endures.
I was reflecting a lot about order and chaos today. Inevitably, in all lives, order is disrupted from time to time, with everything from a minor annoyance to a cataclysmic catastrophe. Of course, “disorder” is another term for “suffering” which comes in all shapes and sizes. I decided that the key to understanding why we suffer when there is disorder is that we believe that chaos is not, or at least should not be, part of the Divine plan. More on this in a moment.
I set out late this morning, following a nice massage from my massage therapist host in Auberge Le Canabal, thinking I would have a very easy day of walking. After tiring myself so dramatically the day before, I was not in much of a mood to be energetic today. Shortly after setting out, I opted to visit a tiny village called Saint-Juliette, with quite a lovely church just off the beaten path. It was reputed to be one kilometer out of the way. No problem.
I was walking entirely by the road (as it poured rain last night, making the mud even more problematic than the day before) and was delighted to spend some time at the little village saying a prayer in the beautiful old church. After the visit it was time for lunch, but alas, the lunch spot in Saint-Juliette was closed; so I headed toward my destination, the medieval city of Lauzerte. I got halfway down the path which the diversion sign had said would return me to the route, also known as the GR65, also known as the Chemin de Saint-Jacques, only to discover that a farmer had installed an electric fence in the middle of the path.
Who am I to argue with an inconvenience like that? So I retraced my steps, finally getting to the spot I thought I would reach, but after two hours of delay. It was 2:00 at this point, and I was quite hungry, but there was absolutely no food to be found until I would reach Lauzerte two hours later.
I set out on the most direct route, but after 45 minutes of navigating mudslides, I opted for the longer route by the road. As soon as I got to the road, it started to rain, then rain hard. I walked until I found a supermarché and was thrilled to grab some fruit, cheese, nuts, and crackers and eat under an overhang while the skies opened full throttle. Whew!
It is true that obstacles, disorder, chaos, provide an opportunity for growth. Very little progress, or growth, happens in comfort and order. I won’t be so bold as to say today’s many obstacles caused me to grow, at least not necessarily. But when I look at this medieval city of Lauzerte, I can’t help but think that the obstacles this city dealt with, just to sustain life, are the majority of the reason it is such a magnet for visitors, and one of the most beautiful cities in France. The city has developed an aura, a sheen, that seems to know how to take adversity in stride, without commentary or evaluation. Things simply are what they are.
I’m staying in a gîte, called Chez Serge, run by the charming and very friendly Sergio. The house is from the 12th century. How many lives have come and gone through these walls? Yet somehow with each successive generation, we build on adversity, on chaos and defeat, to grow, evolve, become more conscious and aware.
Chaos and disorder are never welcome, but it’s pretty clear the world could not exist without them. Our task is to accept that